Ian Wallace Interpretation:
Dreaming that you or your partner are having an affair has nothing to do with being unfaithful in waking life. Rather, this dream reflects a situation in which you feel guilty for letting yourself down; you are betraying your commitment to a creative process or activity that is close to your heart. You have lost self-confidence and faith in your abilities and this, in turn, is preventing you from reaching your potential. Believe in your natural talents and abilities and be proud of what your passion has helped you to create so far. Rather than investing energy in feeling guilty about letting yourself down, make the commitment to develop your capabilities confidently. It may be that you have faith in your talents but worry that other people will disapprove of your passion and try to stop you pursuing it. This passion is a fundamental part of who you are, so have the courage to defend it. If other people describe your pursuit as irrational and you try to please them by ignoring your passion, it may show up in your dreams as an unconventional lover.
Dream: You are almost certain that your romantic partner is having an affair. They are coming home late, seem distracted and appear to have lost all interest in you. Although you frantically search for clues, you can’t find anything that definitely proves their infidelity. Your suspicions are confirmed, however, when you find some pictures of them with another lover, or walk into a room and find them clinched in a passionate embrace with another person. Even though you are devastated at your discovery, you are satisfied that your fears were justified. No matter how angry you are, you still feel terribly let down by your lover.
Meaning: Dreaming that your partner is being unfaithful is usually triggered when you begin to lose faith in your own sexiness and attractiveness in waking life. Although it can be tempting to think that your partner has been spending intimate time with someone far more alluring, this dream often reflects that you are losing touch with some of your fundamental needs, making you feel less attractive than usual. This can often happen when a situation in your daily life is frustrating you and causing you to lose confidence in yourself. Your frustration and lack of self-assurance usually occur, however, when you stop trusting your judgement and start looking to others for their approval and appreciation. Your need for approval can lead you to abandoning ambitions that are close to your heart, and although you might rationalize that you are doing it in your best interests, you unconsciously feel that you have let yourself down. This can make you feel bored and impatient with yourself and, instead of voicing your feelings in waking life, you project your unresolved restlessness onto your significant other. Rather than sharing your frustrations with your current partner, you may even start hoping that some other potential lover will find you attractive and you might end up daydreaming about having an affair yourself. The more confident that you are in waking life, the more confidently you can step into your new future and become the person you always dream of being.
Action: This dream is letting you know you that you are betraying yourself in some way. You are losing faith in your abilities and are probably relying too much on approval from other people to make you feel needed and special. Rather than constantly looking to others to make you feel attractive and bolster your confidence, this dream is encouraging you to just be yourself. It can be easy to allow others to have the responsibility for your hopes and aspirations but it is now time for you to reaffirm your faith in your purpose and potential.
Background: In our intimate relationships, we tend to project our feelings of self-worth and self-esteem on to our intimate partners. This is particularly true in new relationships where we often view our new partner as a prize who reflects our deepest desires, rather than an ever-present and supportive pillar. We can end up feeling that our partner is somehow responsible for our happiness and fulfilment and, when we are unhappy with ourselves, it can be far too easy to place the responsibility on them instead of having more faith in our abilities.